Confession

I'm going to come out and say it: I don't like camping.

I suppose even that is a bit rash. See, it's not that I don't like camping, it's just that even the idea of camping has absolutely no appeal to me whatsoever. I know it's wonderful to get away, to find places with no cell reception or anything and just "be one with nature" and all that. But not for this guy. No way. Not me.

I really quite like getting outdoors, even out of the city. I like a good hike from time to time, I really enjoy both the fresh air that is to be had out amongst the wonderful trees, and there is hardly a single sight I enjoy than a pitch black night with a sky full of stars. No noise pollution, no air pollution, just a clear night sky through the treetops. But here's the kicker about all that: I like to take all that in, and then go have a nice snooze somewhere inside. On a bed. As much as I tend to enjoy relieving myself in public (I mean, come on, who doesn't?), I prefer having that be a second option behind indoor micturition. It's the simple difference between choice and necessity.

The other big lure everyone talks about other than sleeping under the stars and getting away and all that is the whole "ohh, every night you can have a camp fire to sit around." Well, I find fores to be far more enjoyable when either on the beach or when they are across from a couch with a nice young woman on it. Again, proximity to a bed is a factor in this one, but you know what I mean - wink wink. Then again, no cozy fire anywhere has done me much good in general lately.

So for all the wonders of relaxation, starlit nights, and communing with nature, I think I'd do much better with a flushing toilet and a bed.