Nerd Transport, Part 2: The Segway

Sorry for the delay - I was out of town all weekend, and haven't hardly been in front of the computer since Thursday.

But, walking to work this morning, not only did I walk behind the tool that fell off his scooter some days ago, another block closer to my office, I saw coming towards me such a singular abomination, I couldn't get the camera in my iPhone ready in time to take a picture. Coming towards me at about 5 mph was a Segway.

Yeah, I see them around, I know about all the tour groups that use Segways as easy transportation, and I think it's wonderful. Then again, they also use those silly little electric yellow three-wheeler thingies, but I don't see private citizens running out to buy one of those.

So once again you have it: nerd status symbol, lazy transportation, and yet another means of transport that I wouldn't be caught dead on. See a few weeks back, I had a discussion with a friend about Segways. He said they were compelling, and that it seemed interesting, and I agree wholeheartedly. However, the problem is, if I actually got on one of those things except for on an organized tour, I might have to punch myself in the face.

Yet another piece in the puzzle of my Segway aversion: this past year in the Jeopardy Teen Tournament, there was a chubby lad of about seventeen whom most of us would call a dork. Granted, the mere fact that he was on the Jeopardy teen tournament probably didn't bode well for him. Still, he had a rather unfortunate bowl cut, glasses, and was wearing a blazer that looked like it needed a crest on it. So in the regular "meet the players" part of the program, Alex Trebek talked to him about his plans for college and the fact that still at almost eighteen, the gent didn't have a driver's license. He informed ol' Trebek that he never really planned to get a license either. And when asked about going around campus, Alex asked if, like most people, he was planning on getting a bike.

Of course, he replied that he had one plan: to use the money that he might use on a car to purchase a Segway. Thanks kid, for confirming every single stereotype about doughy nerds and their choice of transport. No bike, no car. Just him leaning forward ever so slightly to get wherever the world needs him to be. Plus, we know all too well, there is only one person on this whole planet who can make a Segway look cool...