On water skis, hopping over Jaws.

It almost pains me to say this... almost.

Family Guy; I fear you have jumped the shark.

I was more than willing to ride things out with some of last season's episodes, ADD though they may have been. I was willing to look the other way when you tried a few zany contrivances. I chalked them up to ironic usage. I was even willing to forgive the increased instances of your quirky little pop culture references.

But this season, it has all changed. In case you have forgotten, Family Guy, there is this little thing called "plot" and from all of my experiences in studying literature and the like, I hear that it is somewhat important to a narrative. Alas, you have neglected that goofy convention we call plot in the favor of cramming in as many cut-to-scenes as possible in a half hour television program. If I have to hear Peter say "That reminds me of the time..." again, I just might lose it. You see, those little dalliances into absurdist pop culture and eighties nostalgia can only take an effort so far. When there are fifteen minutes devoted to that, and seven or eight minutes of plot, max, there can't be much of a story going on.

Please, Family Guy, for the good of your show, and for all those fans who fought and petitioned so fervently to bring you back from the depths of obscurity, go back to writing stories and throwing a few cut scenes here and there, instead of writing a miniature story to tie together your cut scenes. Take a lesson from the Simpsons (again) and take stock of where you went wrong and address the problem instead of plowing blindly headfirst into the rubbish bin.

If and when you do right the ship, I'll be there waiting for you. Until then, strap on your water skis and look out for hostile creatures under the surface waiting to snap. Which reminds me of the time that I got kicked out of Sea World...